Everyday more quirky releases crowded the iOS app store; Each trying it’s hardest to suck in those millions of consumers who snapped up the best mobile gaming has to offer. ClumsyPirates looks to be the newest contended in the market, but is it a decent attempt at the near impossible?

ClumsyPirates brings another puzzle game into the bucket for the budget on-the-go gamer featuring a childish cartoon pirate theme visuals and a simple to grasp time based puzzle. You control a small pirate who presumably can’t drink with the big boys. Without rum intoxicating his organs, he’s the only shipmate capable of fending off the bombs suddenly turning up on the ship. Use your deployable bubbles to take those bombs to the deck and throw them overboard as fast as you can and you gain yourself a nice score. Just try to time your lifts to the right area of the ship to collect the dubloons on the way and you’ll bump that score up a litte more.

Its premise may sound decent at best, but it’s quite the opposite in execution. Its overly childish graphics and cheap, irritating, animations bring it below the quality of very similar flash games available on the Internet for free. Pair that with its seemingly random path the character takes across the stages levels means its effectively just up to luck to decide whether that perfectly placed bubble gets you to the last Dubloons on the ship or you fall down the crack in the boards, miss that shiny coin and explode from the combustible mass of chemicals resting in your hands.

It was a decent enough attempt on their behalf but ClumsyPirates just screams to be targetted toward the age range incapable of seeing a lazy game if it hits them in the face. Though the same age would have no chance of seeing it through to the end or perfecting a single puzzle. Aside from that anyone older will certainly close the app after 10-20 minutes and never open it back up again.

Audio/Visuals: 1/5 – The cartoon visuals and static backdrops never serve as the game’s charm but instead look like they’re designed to appeal to the age nge completely incapable of actually playing the game.

Gameplay: 2/5 – There is a decent amount of thought required for some of the later puzzles, but the unreliable direction the character chooses after climbing a ladder can easy ruin that flawless solution you planned out carefully.

Innovation: 2/5 – There’s nothing here that you most likely haven’t already seen for free on an online flash game portal and nothing else is going to sell it to you.

Value: 3/5 – Even if it’s pretty unenjoyable Clumsy Pirates is still a dirt cheap app that gives  does provide content for its money if you actually manage to get to it.